I woke up this morning feeling like shit. Couldn’t get up until noon, and even when I finally did, I wasn’t too happy about it. I’ve been dreaming about Baby all night, and by the time I woke up I just felt tortured.
But, then, I had the loveliest surprise, the mailman brought me a package from a girl that follows me on instagram… And I was SO touched and moved by it, I started to cry. She made me 4 bracelets, each one more beautiful than the other, they were all pink and sparkly and had anchors on them.. Everything I love. And then one of them had “Baby” letters on it. I know she made it to make me happy, but everything related to my little Baboosh makes me tear up. I was just a mess.
So to avoid dwelling and feeling down, Roko and I decided to spend the day outside. We took his dog, a blanket, cookies, snacks and even hookah.. And it was such a nice day, and we had fun and relaxed and it was all perfect, really.
But on our way back, I just kept crying in the car. It makes me so sad that the spring came and it’s so beautiful out, and Baby would be so happy to go on all these walks with me.. We would spend most time together during this period.
And everybody was out with their dogs, and it just breaks my heart seeing it.
I know, I know, time will help with it all, and soon I won’t feel so horrible all the time.. But for now, even these gorgeous spent days make me sad.
Because I wish she was here with me. ❤